JOMO / The Joy of Missing Out

March 17, 2020

(A Girlfriend Day Out with Oprah!)

A few weeks ago, before the country began to shut down, a few girlfriends and I attended Oprah’s 2020 Vision Tour at the Forum in Inglewood / Los Angeles. It was a day full of intention, uplifting stories and mindful group work (with all 13,600 of us!). Oprah did not disappoint with her words of wisdom, spiritual teachings and magnificent story-telling laden with both aha and LAUGH OUT LOUD moments.

She talked about the peace she has now in her mid-60s: a calm and serene energy that she wants those of us younger than her to look forward to. There were many takeaways from the day, but one that stood out for me was Oprah’s distancing from FOMO (the fear of missing out) and leaning more into JOMO (the joy of missing out).

In the April 2020 Oprah magazine, writer K. Aleisha Fetters expands upon this notion: “ … JOMO; short for the joy of missing out .. [is a] term that captures the relief that comes with nixing activities and social engagements that stress you out – and can ultimately hurt your health.”

Sophie Lazarus, PhD (psychologist @ Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center) states that the goal of JOMO is to be intentional about how you spend your time and energy.

And even though I have set a very specific intention to slow down my life over the past year or two and be more mindful about how I am spending my time and with WHOM, I realize that as much as I have TRIED to implement this, I continued to miss the mark. My life has remained a non-stop whirlwind of activities and To Dos.

Insert COVID-19: and although I am worried and anxious about SO MANY things that are truly outside of my control, I am grateful for the ways I am being forced to lean into the stillness, isolation and the slowing down of LIFE. This is my own form of JOMO, and a new normal for me if you will.

And as we are all slowing down, I am grateful for the impact that these actions are having on the greater health of the inhabitants of this universe (as well as the planet earth we reside upon).

I could not have expressed it better than one of my brilliant wisdom teachers, Dr. Shefali Tsabary, in an email sent out earlier today:

Yes, things are inconvenient
Yes, things are chaotic
Yes, the kids at home are a handful
Yes, yes, yes

But you know what else is a YES?

Yes, to quiet
Yes, to stillness
Yes, to self-reflection and growth
Yes, to being and connection
Yes, to healthy eating and exercising
Yes, to creativity
Yes, to decluttering and organizing
Yes, to finishing to-do lists
Yes, to reaching out and catching up with all
Yes, to meditating
Yes, to all things we never had time for before


The earth is saying yes to the reprieve
To no cars on the road
To less garbage in the oceans
To less waste in the landfills
To less pollution from the factories
To fewer accidents and carnage

The earth is breathing a sigh of relief – are you?

Remember: you can look at this through the eyes of scarcity or abundance. Which do you choose?


So, my loves: how can we lean into what is most certainly an intentional message for us all?

I choose to lean into this new flow; even if it looks much different than I had visioned for myself.

How are you taking care of your spirit, soul and body today?


Susanna Peace Lovell

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